Mike and Babs’ Love Story

Or

(According to Babs)

 – The Story of our Lives –

 Good afternoon, everybody! You are very welcome to this celebration. It’s not exactly a renewal of vows; as many of you know, Mike and Babs got married in 1992 purely for tax purposes; no, it’s a celebration of the Renewal of the Commitment in Love that Mike and Babs made to each other many years ago, long before they married. It’s that commitment in love that really matters, say this unique and romanticcouple.

Mike, Babs and I had breakfast together sometime back. We chatted, they told me their wonderful love story and I am now going to share it with you.

It was the late 1970’s …

The DJ played

“Be exactly what you want to be, do what you want to do

I am he and she is she but you’re the only you.”

It was Crass’s ‘Big A. Little A’ that had Mike and Babs up dancing at the Tennis Club Disco in the late 70’s. Not that Punk Rocker Babs was doing that much dancing, she was too busy watching another Punk Rocker. His name was Mike and she became besotted with him. Mike was looking, too, but it was Babs’ sister that first took his attention. I can understand that, says Babs. “My sister was a posh punk and I was like a boy punk, a fella”. “Why would he be looking at me?”

Mike and Babs were just 17 and they loved Punk. They loved what Punk stood for. Live your own life, live it the way you want to live it; be yourself: freedom and choice.

They’ve lived their life like that; two beautiful people singing their own songs to their own tune and coming together to sing wonderful duets, each voice truly distinctive, merging to where they are inseparable and yet individual.

Their bands, their songs; their ‘Golden Brown.’

 Golden brown texture like sun

Lays me down with my might she runs

Throughout the night

No need to fight

Never a frown with golden brown.

Babs says it was she that chased Mike but it was still Babs’ sister that Mike was keen on. That was the way it was until St. Stephen’s Day in 1981 and a party that they both found themselves at. “Where ever Mike was, I was, says Babs.”

And that night; was the beginning, the real beginning!  “I wasn’t getting anywhere with anybody”, says Mike, “so, I walked her home. Babs, that is” “Yeah, it was lovely but the following day, I was wondering, am I going out with her or what?” “We kissed, says Babs, on that first walk home. Yeah, it was lovely. I’d been waiting!” Babs says,“it was like the feeling when you get a job; kind of like, I got it! That was it. It’s funny, isn’t it!” Then Mike recalls, “Then we were together. When we got to know each other – then I knew. This was it”

Two punk rockers falling in love, in their own inimitable way.

And they’ve been together since; in their own wonderful and inimitable way.

 Every time just like the last

On her ship tied to the mast

To distant lands

Take both my hands

Never a frown with golden brown

They were young and together. Not doing everything together, Babs stresses. They were independent, had their own lives. But they were together.

Soon after they were together, Babs’ folks emigrated and Babs stayed. She rented a flat and was in college studying to be a Lab Technician and Mike was serving his apprenticeship to become a painter decorator. The flat was expensive so it made sense for her to move out to Airfield where Mike lived with his Dad. Separate rooms, of course. Separate rooms or not, Babs became pregnant with Noah. The time came for Jan to enter this beautiful world. It was early one morning and Babs felt that there was something moving. When it’s your first, you don’t really know what’s happening. Mike’s Dad offered to drive them to the Rotunda. “No, we’re grand”, says Mike. Independent Mike! Butafter Mike’s Dad left for work, they realised they weren’t grand! So they decided to walk to the Rotunda. From Airfield, Raheny. 5 miles! “We were mad,” says Babs. “Maybe you should stop a car.” “Nah, we’ll be grand. Maybe we’ll stop a taxi.” As it turned out they decided there wasn’t a ‘move’ so they turned around and walked back. To Airfield, Raheny. Ah, when you’re young!

Noah eventually did arrive! And he entered fully into Mike and Babs’ life. They were now living by the Grand Canal, near the Barge Pub. Picture Noah in the baby seat of Babs’ bike as they travelled everywhere together. Even to college parties! Noah is still travelling and is here this afternoon all the way from Australia along with his wife and family. In case Ailbhe and Amber say, hey, what about us, I should say that they too, have travelled home from Australia to be here for this special occasion.

Things weren’t all rosy. Things were tough in the 80s. Money was scarce. Friday nights were shopping and launderette nights. If Mike had to work on a Saturday, the lads at break would be all, ‘Jeez, a great night last night, lads.’ “What ye get up to, yourself, Mike?” But Mike loved his life and wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Yes, it was tough. Money. A young baby. College. But their friends and family were a huge support and have been throughout their lives. And they really appreciate that and I think you know they do.

Babs did stay on in college mostly because of her sister’s and Mike’s encouragement. Thank you, Rachel.

Babs was now working. They both saved for a house. They looked in town. “No, couldn’t afford that.”“What! Celbridge! Sure that’s out in the sticks.”“We’re not moving out there!”Well, they did and are very glad they did for they have built up a circle of friends that they count themselves very lucky to have. It’s where Ailbhe, Amber, and Sofia joined Noah; Amber and Sofia were born as home births in the living room. Mike and the children were present at each birth. Oh, and Phil, too. Hello Phil! When Sofia was delivered, Amber rushes onto the street and shouts “It’s a boy.” Minutes later, and after a good look, she rushes out again, “No, it’s a girl,” she shouts.

Together through thick and thin. And there has been ‘thin.’ Of course there have been challenges. These challenges have been overcome by a commitment and by conscious work, by being brave and not being afraid to ask the difficult questions. Mike and Babs both say that a relationship as long as theirs evolves and grows and you do allow each other to evolve and grow. And they have done just that.

When I asked Mike to say what he values most about his relationship with Babs, he said: He is aware of what he has in Babs and he treasures it. He loves her. He is not complacent and he falls in love with her over and over again.

Babs loves that Mike is generous, patient, creative, wise in the moment, funny, loving and of course so talented.

Mike and Babs wanted today so as they could all gather as a family, as adults, and say how much they love each other and say how much they love Noah, Ailbhe, Amber and Sofia. And to celebrate that love while, well, they can.

They are also so happy that you, their wider family and friends can join with them on this very special day.

To close, Mike and Babs, will now sing together Lisa Hannigan and Ray LaMontagne’s ‘O Sleep.’

… two beautiful people singing this song to its one tune, coming together to sing a wonderful duet, each voice truly distinctive, merging to where Mike and Babs are inseparable and yet individual.